The Epic
by HetChrome
Summary: Tsuna, 2AM cramming, Hibari, and spiders. You see where this is going? 1827 HibaTsu


Kinda graphic, not advised if you like spiders.

Everything was Reborn's fault. Why?

Because everything is always Reborn's fault.

Even after middle school, even after high school, even in college, Reborn was antagonizing him.

It was because of him that Tsuna was up studying until late, with promises of Spartan torture ringing in his ears if he didn't get above 80 points on his next test.

Which also happened to be math.

Which also happened to be his worst subject. It figured.

Tsuna finally shut his books when the clock ticked to around 2:30AM, but his vision was too blurry to really figure out the time. He sighed and rubbed his eyes, stumbling off to the bathroom to get ready for bed. On his way, he passed the dark lump on the other bed – which happened to be Hibari Kyouya, his roommate.

Well, roommate and boyfriend.

It's a long story.

So Tsuna traipsed over to the washroom and rinsed his face in the sink, groping about blindly for a towel as fat drops of water splattered everywhere. As he wiped off his face and looked up, he jumped, hit his head against a cabinet, scrambled to the other side of the small room, and laid there with his mouth opened in a silent "O" of horror.

For sitting on the wall right next to where Tsuna's head had been was a giant, fat, ugly, hairy spider.

Tsuna _hated_ spiders.

He sat there, eyes not moving away from the vile thing, and attempted to calm his fluctuating heart.

His lips said silently, _What do I DO!_

Hibari was sleeping – he was usually the one that got rid of all the scary things in their dorm. Waking him up was probably pretty stupid, considering the last time Tsuna did that (in high school), a very pissed Hibari demanded that Tsuna give compensation, and he ended up practically raping Tsuna in a janitor's closet (not doing that again).

So, yeah, not a good idea. His ass still hurt thinking about it.

_Something poisonous_. Yes, something that would kill the spider. Tsuna's eyes darted around the room, looking for anything that might be harmful enough, finally alighting upon a can of _OFF!_ from their last school-wide camping trip (also not doing that again).

But has luck would have it, the can was right next to the wall the spider was on.

Fuck.

Tsuna edged over, keeping a wary eye on the spider, and snatched the bottle, rushing back before the spider could, like, launch itself at him or something.

Tsuna positioned his finger on the top, pointed it at the spider, and edged the nozzle as close to the spider as he dared.

Sppppraaaaaaaaaaaaaayyyy.

The spider moved a little, but sluggishly. Tsuna panicked, and tried again.

.

It moved a little again.

Tsuna abandoned the bottle, ran out of the room to grab a flat-bottomed mop that they used to keep their rooms clean, and edged back in.

The spider had not moved.

But Tsuna didn't want to kill the spider with the mop; he'd get spider guts and stuff all over it, and then he'd have to wash it, and… yeah.

Did not want to wash spider guts.

There was a convenient toilet paper wrapper sitting on the toilet.

How convenient.

He picked up the paper in one hand, and poked at the spider on the wall with the mop, which fell onto the tiled floors. The eight hairy legs scrambled. Tsuna gave a high-pitched shriek and then clamped his jaws shut, listening to see if Hibari had awoken. Nope.

He dropped the wrapped on top of the spider, and smashed the mop over the whole shebang.

Smash. Smashsmash. He put a slippered foot over the mop and stepped on it. Squishsquishsquish.

Tsuna's lips twisted. Is it dead yet?

Smashsmash. He tilted his head to the side and contemplated what to do. And then carefully, deliberately, he laid the mop against the wall and stepped away.

Okay.

Let some else clean it up.

And Tsuna went to bed.

"Tsunayoshi."

Tsuna groaned and pulled the blankets up over his head. A large, callused hand took his shoulder and shook him. Tsuna sat up groggily, rubbing the sleep out of his heavy eyes.

Hibari lifted an eyebrow at him, and said, "Good morning. 1) You have eye bags. 2) I can see your stomach. 3) Why is the mop in the bathroom?"

Tsuna blushed and hurriedly pulled down his pajama top. "Erm, yeah, I was studying late last night." He paused to yawn widely. "There's a dead spider under the mop."

Hibari looked at the bathroom door and sighed, sitting down next to his lover. He pinched the bridge of his nose.

"…..Why…"

They sat in silence for a while.

"…"

"You're going to be late."

"HIEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!"

So yeah, true story guys. Happened just like that, though I don't get hot college boyfriends.


End file.
